to suffer in style..

Last Sunday, I heard mass at Calaruega with some friends. Travel time was about 3 hours including a quick breakfast at Jolibee. We arrived just before the 11am mass started. It was only my second time to be there.


this is the church [more photos in www.pbase.com/tekgik/tagytay]

The priest (I think his name is Fr. Rico) was great. Everyone was awake (and laughing) during his sermon. How ironic becuse the gospel is about suffering and carrying one's cross. He kept saying at the end of each of his funny stories, "mahirap ang buhay...". And he would say this in such a way that you'd want to cry -- cry in joy. Hindi ko ma-explain pero kakaiba yun feeling ng realization na 'to.

The problem with us, he said, is we often mistake problems with difficulties. There are solutions for the first one. And as for the latter, we'll just have to deal with it. There are no solutions and there's nothing we can do.

He said that life here on earth is about suffering. But we can always "suffer in style."

Read more...

i hope it's not what i think it is ... (really)

Around 6pm, someone sent me an IM. It just said hi, followed by how s/he addresses me and a sad smiley (hmm.. sad smiley? hehe) -- sad emoticon. I felt weird. Anyway, I checked the emoticon toolbar to check if the happy emoticon and sad emoticon are placed next to each other. They are. So, i thought s/he just did a mistake. I replied with a plain 'hello' message and didn't bother to ask if there was anything wrong. Besides, we are not that close. I received no reply. afterwards.

After a few minutes, s/he replied back. S/he said sorry for the late reply. S/he said s/he has a big problem. The sad emoticons are in the messages. My assumption was incorrect. Something is wrong. I asked her/him what the problem is. Again, no reply. I closed the IM window after some time. Then, this followed. I'll changed her/his Y! ID to protect her/his identity.

unknown: sorry ngayun lng ako nakapag reply
BUZZ!!!
lil_avalanche: ano po?
unknown: --- ---
unknown: tita ko kc nasa hospital
unknown: critical nasa icu
unknown: na hearth attack
lil_avalanche: ulit?
unknown: i mean, na-heart attack ulit?
unknown: now lng
unknown: wait
lil_avalanche: ah..
unknown: --- ---
unknown: pde ba ako borrow ng 3k syo
unknown: pay ko na lang tom or saturday
lil_avalanche: naku, pasensya na po.. wala ako mapapahiram eh
unknown: kahit sna shareload lng pra makacall cousin ko
lil_avalanche: teka, iba pa ba yan tita mo na na-heart attack dn dati?
BUZZ!!!
****end of IM*****

From what I can remember, this is only the 2nd time we've had a private IM conversation. The 3rd one would be in a conference. In the first private IM, s/he told me that her/his tita was hospitalized for the same reason and that s/he was sad because it was one of her/his closest tita. I tried to console her/him at that time and somehow the conversation just ended there. Either s/he or I no longer replied at that time.

That is the reason why I felt weird when I first read her/his IM today. It was the same thing s/he told me. That is the reason why I asked 'ulit?' at the first part of the conversation. And I'm sure it isn't deja vu.

That is the reason why I didn't lend her/him money. Why would s/he ask me when there are other people closer to her/him -- relationship wise and proximity wise. Why me?

I was feeling bad because I'm thinking such things of her/him when her/his last message came in -- 'kahit sna shareload lng pra makacall cousin ko'. Again, why me, of all people? Isn't it easier to ask the ones s/he is with right now?

Just to be sure, I asked if it was the same tita that was hospitalized before. But s/he didn't reply. I buzzed her/him but still no reply.

Was it someone else? But I checked her/his Y! ID, it was her/him. I even checked our egroup to see if I have the correct ID. I have. Was someone else using her/his account? But how could that person know me?

My hands are so cold. I can't believe what just happened. I don't know if I should tell the story and who s/he really is to other people. To people who know her/him. Anyway, maybe it's enough that I've told it here.

By the way, s/he is still online but haven't replied. I've buzzed her/him again. If s/he does reply, I'll post it here.

Read more...

bagong PC atbp.

Bago na ang PC ko! Yey! (next time, magdadala ko ng cam para maipakita ko dito).

Kaya lang hindi na-copy ng maayos yun ibang files at emails kaya inayos ko pa kanina. Hindi ko pa din alam kung alin pang files ang nawawala. Malalaman ko na lang pag kailangan ko na yun mga yun at hindi ko makita.

Kanina, may "nang-away" sa akin na client. Taga-Hong Kong. Pero kahit papano 'naayos' naman. Sana nga. Minsan kasi akala mo ok na tapos after sometime, kakausapin ka ng mga bossing about sa nangyari.

Kahapon, 'napagalitan' naman ako ng isang Big Boss na based sa Singapore. Pero cool lang ako habang sinsabon nya ko sa phone. Medyo na-weirduhan din siguro sya kasi wala akong masyadong reaction. Tama naman din kasi sya. hehe Ano bang meron sa araw na week na 'to? Bakit madaming nagagalit sa kin? Oh, well.

------------

Malapit na lumipat ng place yun 2 kong roomates. Dapat kasama ako na aalis kaso lang medyo inconvenient sa kin yun lilipatan kaya hindi ako sasama. Ma-mimiiss kaya nila ko? At ma-mimiss ko kaya sila? Malamang. Kami lang kasi yun maingay sa bhaus. Mga pasaway. Mga feeling may-ari ng bhaus -- ibig sabihin, kami ang madalas na may hawak ng remote control ng tv! haha Mga mahilig kumain (grabeng kain!).

Naalala ko, ganun din ang nangyari sa dorm ko nun college. After 1 year lumipat din ng place yun roomates ko. Is it me? hehe Pero hindi naman siguro. Swerte nga ako sa mga kasama sa bahay eh. Nakakasundo ko naman sila at napagtitiyagaan nila yun kakulitan ko. hehe Nagkakataon lang talaga na nakakahanap sila ng mas ok na place kaya sila umaalis.

Read more...

public service...

Gabay
presents

A Concert for the Benefit of Gabay Scholarship Fund

Featuring Barbie Almalbis, Orange and Lemons, Cueshe, Stonefree, Mayonnaise and Spongecola

When: August 26,2005 (6:00pm-11:00pm)
Where: Highschool Covered Courts, ADMU

For tickets contact 0917-853-6328/0926-423-6674
or visit Gabay at Mateo Ricci ADMU

Read more...

fave lines from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Veruca Salt: I'm Veruca Salt. It's very nice to meet you, sir.
[does a curtsy]
Willy Wonka: I always thought a verruca was a type of wart you got on the bottom of your foot. Ha, ha.


-------

Willy Wonka: Everything in this room is *eat*able. Even I'm *eat*able. But that is called cannibalism, my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.

-------

Grandma Georgina: You smell like peanuts. I like peanuts.
Willy Wonka: You smell like old people... and soap. I like it.

-------

Willy Wonka: The best kind of prize is a *sur*prise!

-------

Mr. Bucket: Your mum and I thought, maybe you'd like to open your birthday present tonight.
Charlie Bucket: Maybe we should wait until morning.
Grandpa George: Like hell.
Grandpa Joe: All together we're 381 years old. We don't wait.

-------

Grandpa George: Charlie, money is everywhere. They print more and more of it every day. But that ticket? There are only five of them, and that's all there's ever going to be. Only a dummy would give this up for something as common as money. Are you a dummy?

Read more...

on LIFEACHE

A HERBAL Remedy for LIFEACHE.
by the cartoonist Michael Leunig

Your whole life is sore; it hurts when you move it.
HERBAL REMEDY.
Take one patch of grass, a mild day and two large, green trees.
Lie on the grass beneath one tree and contemplate the other tree.
Nap from time to time or gaze occasionally at the grass.
Pain will subside. Lifeache cannot be cured but you can learn to MANAGE THE SYMPTOMS.

**the cartoon version is better, but i can't find one..

------------------------

Headaches and Lifeaches
By Laurie Kiel
04/30/04

The headache begins tentatively, lightly tapping the inside of my temples politely asking for attention. I ignore it and go about my daily distractions. The tapping turns to pounding, as the headache refuses to be dismissed. I pick up the aspirin bottle, preparing to swallow a handful of hoped for relief. I set it down, and pick up a large glass of water. Not to wash down the aspirin but to replace it. I down the water, and then another, and another. And slowly, the headache subsides. It was a dehydration headache. It’s easy to misdiagnose since a headache, not thirst, is the cry for water.

My lifeache begins tentatively, lightly tapping the inside of my heart politely asking for attention. I ignore it and go about my daily distractions. The tapping turns to pounding, as the life ache refuses to be dismissed. I’m depressed, irritable, unsatisfied. I’m tempted to drown my sorrows in food, in television , or in reading a tabloid. But instead I pick up God’s Word, water to my thirsty soul. It was a dehydration life ache. It’s easy to misdiagnose since a lifeache, not spiritual thirst, is the cry for God’s water.

The best way for me to avoid that dehydration headache is to keep drinking deep of fresh, clear water and keep myself fully hydrated. The best way for me to avoid a life ache is to keep drinking deep of the fresh clear water of the Word and keep myself fully spiritually hydrated.

Whether it’s a life ache or a headache, distraction will never cure dehydration. But God’s wonderful water will… if I only drink it in.

Read more...

sinong 'di mapapasayaw sa ulan..

I went to Ateneo this morning. I was supposed to do 5 things but was only able to accomplish 2 of them. The main reason why I went there was to drop by the Pathways office to have an orientation on their Tutoring Program. I was planning to be a volunteer teacher. However, last night while I was reading the ACET invititation to be an Examiner, I realized that I cannot volunteer as a teacher because ACET examiners should not be invloved in any tutorial service to High School students. Oh, well..

--------------

I was soaking wet when I arrived in school. Tumutulo kasi yun bubong nung nasakyan kong trike, tapos lumakas pa yun ulan pagbaba ko. At hindi lang yun, medyo baha yun daan sa may SEC papuntang chapel! Anyway, ano pa nga ba magagawa ko, eh basa na ko eh. The show must go on, sabi nga.

-------------

Pumasok muna ako ng chapel bago pumunta ng OAA. Masarap ang pakiramdam kahit basang basa ako. Medyo magulo nga ata yun conversation ko with Him. Ang dami kasing bumalik na memories nung umupo ako dun. Medyo madalas ako sa chapel nun college eh. Natatawa nga ako kanina nun naalala ko na nagdadasal ako dahil sa isang Math subject nun 1st year. Nahirapan talaga ko sa subject na yun! haha

-------------

Basta, kahit magulo isip ko kanina sigurado akong nagpasalamat ako sa Kanya para sa lahat. Pati na rin sa malakas na ulan.

--------------

By 1pm, nandito na ko sa office. Wala namang masyadong work so ok na Friday ito. hehe Manonod dapat kmi ng Charlie and the Chocolate Factory mamyang gabi pero hindi natuloy. Pero tuloy pa din ang dinner.

--------------

Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nagkkwento. Pero magandang sign 'to. It means I'm recovering from the Lifeache episode I've had a couple of weeks ago. The issue wasn't resolved (yet) pero mas ok na ang pakiramdam ko. Mas nakakatulog na ng maayos.

--------------

Basta since Monday, may kakaibang aura. It must be the rain...

Read more...